Agreements

My Beloved, I have a very difficult request of you.

In my work I counsel battered women. I don’t feel I’m very good at it because I’ve “never walked a mile in their shoes”. I grew up in a very loving family and all I’ve known was love and compassion. All they know is pain and fear. We don’t communicate.

So, my Beloved, I need to know what it is like to experience that pain and fear. My request to you is that you abuse me for a month. Make it terrible. No matter how much I beg don’t stop until the full month is done.

I can’t do that, I love you.

Because you love me I need you to do this.

So it is agreed and it begins.

Every time she disagrees he hits her until she is afraid to speak.

Every time dinner is late or the clothes are not folded just right he yells and tells her what a useless woman she is until she hates it when he comes home from work.

When he wants sex he has it. If she’s not in the mood he makes her feel guilty then hits her just for good measure until what was once a wonderful thing becomes dreaded.

After two weeks she’s had enough of this experience and asks him to stop. He hits her and tells her to shut up.

Every day it continues and she is afraid and cries.

Every night he secretly cries for what he is doing to his beloved.

Then finally the month is over and with great relief he can go back to his gentle loving ways. But she is angry with him.

How can you do all those terrible things to me, someone who you say you love.

I was only because I love you so much that I entered into this agreement with you. Now you can go on to be a wonderful counselor for those women.

Suddenly she remembered the agreement with her beloved and all was right again and she appreciated his gentle loving ways more than ever before. And she was an awesome counselor.

It’s a shame that we don’t remember our agreements made as we entered this lifetime. Maybe we would appreciate more those that love us so much that they would do anything for us just because we asked.

Ramron

February 13, 2001